I have come to an odd state of mind lately. Talking to a friend from home about college, I nearly subconsciously divulged that I would love to sell my belongings, buy a van and food, and travel America helping people. Every broken down car, hitchhiker, beggar, what have you. Before I realized it, I was fired up and excited about what I wasn't even making preparations to do.
Hold the phone, you (and society) say. What about being respectable? What about college? If not a prerequisite for a career, it's at least a prerequisite for social acceptance. The friends I've shared my desire with seem to raise the eyebrows to the ceiling, wondering if it would be rude to laugh at my idea. The bottom line is that I feel like being where I am is a lame idea. As my good buddy Brad Kinnison said, "It feels kind of silly to be Christians in a Christian school with other Christians talking about what it means to be a Christian." What he is getting at is this: We can talk, or do. The time we spend here feeling good and faithful could be spent making a difference that goes beyond having a fun time meeting new people in college or working towards a career we may not understand the appeal of. God doesn't call people to discuss and debate, he just calls them to do. I feel like, if God could offer his view on the topic verbally to us in conversation, he would say "Well, you can either talk about what should be done...or just do it. No wasted time, no arguments, just action and change."
The prophet Jeremiah is approximated by historians to be the age of 19 when he began his minsitry. I am 19. Society was probably telling him he needed to work in an apprenticeship or start building a flock and finding a wife. Society is telling me I need to build credentials and a career and find a wife out of one of the many lovely women at Olivet Nazarene University. No sarcasm in that last bit, by the way. God told Jeremiah, "No, no. Forget all that. Is your faith about ME, or society? And I know it sounds crazy and dangerous, but I will protect you." God is asking me via the world I view around me and how I view it, "Is your faith about ME, or about this, which society and especially the Christian community try to tell you is about me?" While I've hit that note, I'll expound. When did it become the Christian thing to do to go to college? I feel like if I told my parents I want to be a nomadic philanthropist (except without the years of college and expensive artwork in my house), they would think that I was running from God's call to me to be responsible, they would view me as an angel fallen from my potential, an angel who decided to sin because he didn't want to conform. Like I can't serve Him without a college degree. Ultimately, do I want to serve myself and society with this life, or Him?
Who should I help?
People often say they want to serve God, but then take their situation and just modify it a tiny bit to appear as service. I do believe that we can serve God wherever we are, but too many people use their own plans and those of society as excuses to not go do something radical for God. "I would love to do that, but, I have math homework." God gives less that zero craps about math. It's not a sin to not do homework or feel like college isn't for you. Society says so, using one hand against their cheek like half of a megaphone, and using the other to try and shove God into the box known as "Societal Norms and Procedures", but I believe it is not.
A side note, if it weren't for me feeling like I'm chatting with God right now, I wouldn't be blogging. No one reads my posts anymore. In the words of a song me and the band I'm in wrote, "No one here, but me and God."
Anyhow, that's where I'm at right now. Wanting to be more than society says is acceptable. The real kicker is that I can't just leave and be God's worker. I can, but I know I'll flake out. The urge to fly the coop is not that strong yet. There's always talk of a revolution long before someone has the guts to incite rebellion.
It is awfully romantic to think of this as a rebellion. The important thing to keep in mind is that I am a rebel with a cause.
I used to talk about how I'd like to just volunteer for the rest of my life.. no need for spending so much on myself and an education. It sounds like a good idea to me.
ReplyDeleteThat does sound like a good idea. Although my attitude has changed a wee bit since I wrote this post (I now believe that my service is to be through music or writing, and while I figure those out, I am to make Olivet Nazarene University my personal mission field), I still think we spend way too much on a degree, something people look at and say, oh cool, it's there. You're hired.
ReplyDeleteSociety and normality is really dumb. But if I ever ascended to a power position to try and change this all, I would probably be assassinated, and that's not what I want at all.